PROCESS REPORT #3
We fail to realize that mastery is not about perfection. It’s about a process, a journey. The master is the one who is willing to try, and fail, and try again, for as long as he or she lives. George Leonard
To write is to write is to write is to write is to write is to write is to write is to write. Gertrude Stein
It’s done.
Again.
The manuscript is on its way to New York City and into a receptive agent’s hands. Yesterday I delivered it to the post office, assuring myself that this was the right place and the right time to let it go. After the reconstruction process, especially intense in April, the sole remaining task had been page-by-page “tweaking” of this and that odd phrase, not-quite-right words for the right ones. I easily could go on “tweaking” forever, but my instinctive feeling and even recent journal entries provided a push to send it off.
In one I wrote: The novel seems a kind of Everest – my having created a plot, fleshed out characters, completed the revision. I really believe it is the best I can do at the moment. And I believe in it. Dear Tuck is sleeping at my feet –as if he’s still hanging on to see the completion of this project, too…. I’m def ready for the next stage. Whatever comes.
I’m not as attuned to the proverbial still, small voice as I am to synchronicity — the cosmic nudge that is the equivalent of the Universe’s pat on the back. It is so-called coincidence that most often provides me with a sign to back off or to proceed. So when there was a snafu at the post office related to packaging and postage, I had second thoughts. Was this a sign that I should grab the manuscript and run? The clerk directed me to a corner to fix things. I did, and then told myself, “Give it up to the nice man across the counter, Tunie. Hope for the best.”
Empty-handed, I returned to my car and the opening words of MPR’s mid-morning program about the featured guest. I thought of a line in one of the first paragraphs of my manuscript, a reference to the only actual person named in the book. Speaking of a boy who sees those in the community of underground hip hop as world changers, Claire, the main character says, “He’s a big fan of locals like Brother Ali. Changing the world one rap at a time…”
Brother Ali and (b-girl) Alicia Leafgreen
And the guest on the radio show as I drove away? None other than Brother Ali. I mean, what were the chances? I listened with rapt attention as the articulate rapper touched on themes that are central to my own work. He talked about his own transformative journey. Mentioned a medium, Echo Bodine. Revealed his intent in his brand new album, “Us” (which I ordered when I reached home). It’s about acceptance of diversity, openness to new ways of understanding reality, and empathy for others. He celebrated his own opportunity to become more spiritual, to enrich his soul even as he supports brothers and sisters who don’t have the luxury or inclination yet to do so. He spoke of one’s innate spark as both gift and curse (because one fails to honor it at one’s peril). The interview was a gift (and, as artist and human being, he is, too). I urge you as well to listen to the June 1 program (Brother Ali’s Quest for Fellowship Through Hip Hop).
I recognize when the Universe is having a little fun with me. I was a grinning fool by the time the interview ended. Need a sign, Tunie? How about this one? Not so much a promise of things to come as a benediction and a shout-out that this is a milestone on my journey that’s meant to be.
Photo: Alicia Leafgreen
